They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself!

~ Andy Warhol ~

There was no point staying in the valley where I grew all my children up. I changed this, Brice and I bought a house in the country and now I don't see the ghosts anymore because there is no history here to remind me.   A hard decision, but it was worth it because I have real peace here with Brice and the animals and Montana-Star and Anaan doing great with their lives just down the hill at the coast. 

I have ticked a few off the old bucket list since coming up high where I could breathe.  I have seen snow and I have learned to use a coffee machine while at Kraft group at the Cafe and Ducks... I have never had ducks before, chickens yes and now we have three ducks.   I have also had so many roses to pick because now I have so many rose bushes!  I felt so absolutely blessed by this.  My grapevine is in the ground and loving it.  Brice and I go bush walking to see the rocks. Everywhere not far from home there are magnificent rocks to see and we both love rocks, so it works.

We moved to the Tablelands and I finally saw snow!

Tread lightly always, hush now.  I tried the hardest I could with what I had.  I did my very best everyday.  I loved my children with all of my heart and soul even when life was awkward and difficult, probably more so then.  It never once changed how I felt about them.

  My life is no longer like this, awkward and difficult.  We always have enough and I don't have to live in fear of what drama is around the corner because Brice is as stable as an Earthquake proof house, I never feel insecure with him.  

I have seen some amazing places and met some sensational people since I moved on.  Life is very different and finally I am in a place where peace can bring about healing the parts of my soul that others damaged when I had no choice.   Part of my soul is missing and its difficult to accept it can't be mended by anything I can do.

  Was it me or was their father?  It was both of us together.  We never seemed to be on the same page looking forward.  But we loved our children - pity that a couple of them can't come to terms with this.

Images @ Eminpee Fotography