"A man can do all things if he will"

~ Leon Battista Alberti ~

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It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, but because we do not dare, things are difficult.

~ Seneca ~

The hardest part is beginning.  Whether it be a personal change or a task at hand. I have to do so many things afraid because I can't do it with courage.  Either way I am doing it and that is the part that matters most.
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I want to be alive to all the life that is in me now, to know each moment to the utmost.

~ Kahlil Gibran ~

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Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.

~ Marcus Aurelius ~

Christmas 2015 Deepwater

Today has been a difficult day for so many years now but this year was different.  We lunched at the Cafe along with my new friends in my new town where I live.  Auntie Kay was there with Montana and Anaan and Brice and I and we all had a lovely day sharing with friends.

We gave Anton and Brendan many yummy rum balls for a gift. 

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The truth is you can’t try to let go. Trying is the opposite of letting go. To let go is to relinquish trying. To let go is much more like to let be.

~ Adyashanti ~

Press on and allow things to just drop or fall away from your life.  Getting on with things allows new opportunities to open up in our path which inevitably fill the gaps life leaves when we have walked through any traumatic experiences of loss. This allows healing to occur.

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In Memory of my Mum ... Ellen Katherine Fraser [Peters] (nee Baguley)

 

Deep in thought after the year that has been.  We are here in our new place and I sort of wish I could have my mum over for a coffee. (and a sing song).  She would be so proud of us I am sure.

Today it is the anniversary of her death. It's been 18 years since my mum passed away.  Montana was only a year and a half old when she went.  My poor mummy was just a mere 66 years old and in a flash she was gone.  If she was alive today she would be 83 today.. if my maths is alright.  She was born in 1932 on the 17th February and passed away on the 7th of December 1997 at her beloved home town of Warwick in Queensland. 

I was born there as was all of my brothers and sisters although I have never really lived there other than the first four months of my life.

I love you and miss you Mumma .. I loved the time we did get to have together and I should be a bit more grateful for having had that experience as we did and that you did get to hold all of my little children - It was an awesome day when I phoned you to tell you I was having a baby at last... I hold that moment very dear in my heart.  You had prayed for so long for me.  Sent me special things to help me..  Oh gosh I miss you..  I cry for you still - you would know that since now you are gifted with omnipotence and are with me even though I can't see you.  Sometimes I just long to be little and to have the time ahead to find you again ... I always say I would have done this sooner if only I had known you were just in the next town.  How that flawed me for so long.  I was so devastated we missed all those years together - yes I miss you mummy - sending you big kisses on your cheek and I hope you can feel my love and that you will be there when I come to be with you.  

Love from you daughter .... Mary-Ellen

I found these researching my mums name.  I am so glad my family remembered her.  I won't ever forget her either.

6 year Memorial Notice in the WARWICK DAILY NEWS  (6th December 2003)

FRASER, Ellen Katherine. - 7th December, 1997. You are forever in our thoughts and always in our
hearts. Love always, Ray, David, Jenene, Suellen and families.
Publication Date: 6/12/03

LINK

FRASER, Ellen. - 7th December, 1997. In our hearts you will always stay, Loved and remembered
everyday. Robert and Helena.
Publication Date: 8/12/03

LINK

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Society, and the family as its psychological agent, has to solve a difficult problem: How to break a person's will without his being aware of it?

 Yet by a complicated process of indoctrination, rewards, punishments, and fitting ideology, it solves this task by and large so well that most people believe they are following their own will and are unaware that their will itself is conditioned and manipulated.

~ Erich Fromm ~

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... With or without anyone’s acknowledgment or affection, you are enough!

~ Daniell Koepke ~

“It’s easy to feel un-cared for when people aren’t able to communicate and connect with you in the way you need. And it’s so hard not to internalize that silence as a reflection on your worth. But the truth is that the way other people operate is not about you. 

Most people are so caught up in their own responsibilities, struggles, and anxiety that the thought of asking someone else how they’re doing doesn’t even cross their mind. They aren’t inherently bad or uncaring - they’re just busy and self-focused. And that’s okay. 
It’s not evidence of some fundamental failing on your part. It doesn’t make you unloveable or invisible.  

It just means that those people aren’t very good at looking beyond their own world. But the fact that you are - that despite the darkness you feel, you have the ability to share your love and light with others - is a strength.  

Your work isn’t to change who you are; it’s to find people who are able to give you the connection you need. Because despite what you feel, you are not too much.... You are not too sensitive or too needy. 

You are thoughtful and empathetic. You are compassionate and kind, and with or without anyone’s acknowledgment or affection, you are enough.”

~ Daniell Koepke ~

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"My profession is to always find God in Nature."

~ Henry David Thoreau ~

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I once asked a bird, how is it that you fly in this gravity of darkness? The bird responded, 'Love lifts me.'

 ~ Hāfez ~

One of my favorites ... The Red Tailed Black Cockatoo.

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Play for us, you big wild gypsy girl,

~ Tom Robbins ~ 

Play for us, you big wild gypsy girl, you who look as if you might have spent the morning digging potatoes on the steppes of Russia;
you who surely galloped in on a snorting mare,
bareback or standing in the saddle; you whose chicory tresses reek of bonfire and jasmine;
you who traded a dagger for a bow;
grab your violin as if it were a stolen chicken,
roll your perpetually startled eyes at it,
scold it with that split beet dumpling you call a mouth;
fidget, fuss, flounce, flick, fume–and fiddle;
fiddle us through the roof, fiddle us over the moon, higher than rock ‘n’ roll can fly;
saw those strings as if they were the log of the century,
fill the hall with the ozone of your passion;
play Mendelssohn for us, play Brahms and Bruch;
get them drunk, dance with them,
wound them, and then nurse their wounds,
like the eternal female that you are;
play until the cherries burst in the orchard,
play until wolves chase their tails in the tearooms;
play until we forget how we long to tumble with you in the flower beds under Chekhov’s window; play, you big wild gypsy girl, until beauty and wildness and longing are one.

(Tom Robbins, “Nadja Salerno-Sonnenberg,” 2005)

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